THIRTEEN THINGS I HATE ABOUT LIVING IN THE CITY1. BUS DRIVERS. I don't know about your city, but the bus drivers out here (MTA, Access, Red Line, Orange Line, etc.), drive like they are the only one with rights on the road. There is not one time when I have driven by a bus that has pulled over for passengers and hasn't pulled right out in front of me without looking. Or maybe they do look and they just don't care. They probably figure I'll be so scared that this huge, stinking bus is about to plow me off the road and think twice about asserting my right of way. They lane race (Weaving in and out of lanes to cut people off in order to get to the red light five seconds faster), they don't wait for people who are running along side, slapping the walls while people inside are yelling, "Stop! Someone wants to get on!" I don't know how they train these people or if they even do or perhaps they are just overworked and underpaid like... 2. Those crazy Fed Ex drivers. Those dudes don't give a rats ass who's right of way it is, what color the light is, or even if they are driving on the street or the sidewalk. They have packages to deliver and THAT is more important than defensive driving or, I don't know, NOT killing people. 3. The fact that there are barely any turn arrows. You want to make a left or a right, you get to sit in a turn lane and hope to God the guy in front of you pulls up so that you might be able to make it while the light is still yellow. 4. Senior citizens who are too selfish to give up their license. We've got old men making a killing while driving through the Farmer's Market. We've got stroke victims taking out whole families. We've got old granny driving a suped up 1967 black Chevy Nova 24mph in a 45. Dude, there is free transportation for people over 65. Please utilize it and save lives :) 5. People who think domestic animals can fend for themselves. There are laws in place for a reason. If you can't put your effing dog on a leash and walk him/her yourself then don't get one. Whatever you do, don't just leave the door open and hope he/she gets hit by a car so you don't have to feed it anymore. Get your cats spayed/neutered. It is really sad to see a skinny, flea-infested mama trying to take care of a litter of kitties while living near the dumpster in the back of my building. If I see one more dead animal in my parking lot or on the side of the road I swear, I'm going to claw my own eyes out and eat them. 6. Neighbors who think they are rockstars. This is an apartment building in Reseda, not a soundproof studio in Hollywood. I can't sleep. Asshole. 7. Little kids who think it is really cute to bang on my window and yell, "Kitty!" She doesn't like you so GO AWAY. 8. Said little kids' mom who thinks it is OK to scream, "I hate you! Leave me the @#$% alone! You are a stupid little monster and I WISH YOU WERE DEAD!" God why isn't illegal to talk to your kids like that? Why won't the cops come unless they are being physically abused? 9. Not ten minutes goes by without being serenaded by the siren of a firetruck, ambulance, or a police car. They've even changed the sound of the siren to sound much more annoying. Now they sound like that disco laser beam sound. Sometimes they sound like English padywagons 10. Smog. I'll never understand why on a clear day everyone is running around singing "It's a beautiful day!" Hello, look around you. Can you see your hand in front of your face? Neither can I. Sorry to burst your bubble. It is rarely a beautiful day in LA. Only after the rain and only for a few days. 11. "Taggers" as they call them. I call them ignorant teenagers with nothing better to do than to write illegibly all over someone else's property and then shoot someone in the face if they try to paint over it. What is up with that? Makes no sense to me at all. 12. People who drive around blasting their bass so loud that their windows sound like they are going to shatter. Nobody cares that your stereo sucks and nobody cares about what you are listening to. You're disturbing the peace and I'm not impressed. Asshole. 13. Those guys who try to call you over to them like you are a cat. I'm not your pet and has that ever worked on anyone anyways? I doubt it...Yet you keep it up. Asshole.

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Whew! That didn't at all sound the tiniest bit judgmental at all, did it? I'm not really this bitter. I used to be, but I don't really carry this around with me all the time. I actually had a really good day today. I laughed a lot. For some reason though I snapped when I got home. I need some sleep.