THURSDAY THIRTEEN

Ok, it's a little late, but oh well. And yeah, I was too lazy to use a code for the T13 heading. Anyways:

THIRTEEN QUESTIONS I'D ASK GOD IF I COULD

1. Why is it that if I don't read the bible or something close to it daily my life completely falls apart? I mean, say I do a bible study one night, the next day I feel great and everything is in synch and I don't make stupid mistakes and people are nice and it is all just perfect. Like reading the bible gives me super powers or something to change myself and my surroundings in an instant.

Unfortunately those powers need to be recharged every day because if I don't do it the next night - or whatever, then the NEXT day totally sucks. Everything just falls apart. I can't seem to keep a smile on my face, everything that everyone does irritates me, I am clumsy as all get out, I break stuff, etc.

2. Why is it that when people become born again Christians they become major finger-pointers? I'm guilty too. I'm not just complaining about other people here. We all do it, we've all done it and we'll all do it again. However, I think newborns seem to be more likely to do so.

3. Why does politics get mixed up in our Christianity? Why does a "Liberal Christian" have to vote democratic every. Single. Time, no matter who's running? (It goes vice-versa too). Why do Christians who vote republican roll their eyes when they see "hippies?" Why can't we all just get along? Do you really care if someone doesn't like George Bush? Do you really care if Al Gore made a two hour power-point presentation about global warming? Does anyone's political opinion matter when it comes right down to it? Why do we focus on it so much? Are we as humans just so petty and aggressive - even as Christians - we need to create some sort of trivial, petty conflict over just about anything?

4. Why is the Bible always translated into Greek before English?

5. Why would a Christian man hire a self-proclaimed Satanist (With 666 tattooed on his neck and a pentagram drawn on the palm of his hand) to work craft service at his coffee shop? Especially when the only other people who work there are Christian women?

6. Why do people dumpster-dive? I understand that there's a lot of waste in the world and perhaps people shouldn't consume so much so that there wouldn't be so much thrown away. I understand that people could donate all their excess food to homeless people instead of tossing it in the trash. I can even understand perhaps trash digging and taking what you find to local homeless people that hang out in front of Seven-eleven. What I don't understand is why one would dumpster-dive and keep the food for themselves. Especially if they have a job, and it isn't like they're donating their money to homeless people or whatever. There I go...Finger pointing.

7. Why do some Christian women do whatever their boyfriend or any other man in the world says? I mean, aren't we supposed to only yield to our husband's wishes? I know we aren't supposed to teach men, but do we have to do whatever they say too? I'm sorry, but obeying my husband is all this recovering feminist can handle at this point in time.

8. What is wrong with recycling? Is that soo liberal that now I'm a hippie? I shower, I wear shoes (Mostly), I don't write letters to the president, I don't trip on Acid (Anymore). What is so wrong with trying to just conserve a little bit?

9. Why are there so many denominations (How weird, I initially typed "demonations") of the Church? Does it matter? Am I any less of a Christian if I'm Lutheran instead of Methodist? What makes one a party of one denomination and not the next?

10. Why does one family suffer so much tragedy and heart ache when the one right next door has had nothing but generations of happiness?

11. Why does my mom have to tell everyone she meets that my brother's disease is from a recessive gene. Normally people will just say, "Oh," and move on, but sometimes someone will ask her what that means and she has to say with all the self-satisfaction of the cat who ate the canary, "It means that there was incest in the family. My father's parents were cousins. They're love was forbidden Scotland so they fled to America."

For one thing, I doubt their love was forbidden anywhere, I mean, cousins have been marrying each other (Especially in Europe), for like, ever. Secondly, why do perfect strangers have to know about my grandparents secret, forbidden love anyways? I mean, I'm not ashamed or anything like that, love is love and I don't believe it caused a recessive gene anyways. What gets me is that my mom insists on living with all the drama of a VC Andrews novel. It makes people uncomfortable. She totally doesn't see that. OK, I'm finger-pointing again. See, told you.

12. Why do I have to pay for bible study or Christian retreats or anything that would help me grow in your word better?

13. Why can't I be more motivated to just sit down and read the Bible? Front to back, instead of reading everything else.

You all must think I've lost my mind. Everyone keeps saying they'll pray for me, but do we all know for what? I mean, why do I need prayers? I haven't lost my faith. I haven't become suicidal. I'm not violent or in crisis.

I'm just so moody though. Seriously, I go from laughing hysterically one minute to being so irritable and paranoid that I think everyone is talking about me behind my back (To the point where I think they stop talking and look at me with a "I wish you'd leave," look in their eyes). Is it stress? Am I eating something that screws with my brain? Do I just need another bible study? I don't know what's up with me. I'm sorry if I'm being a downer. Lord knows you all have had so much more than me to deal with. I'm just being selfish. I'm sorry.